Lilly's Report on the day

The build up was there. The Thursday was the wettest day in Ayrshire since records began ! All Thurs night right up to 7 am Friday morning the deluge continued and even though the forecast was suggesting a good day for Friday, I was sure by now Bellisle would be under 12 inches of water !

 However, as I climned out of my scratching pit on Friday am…the sun is out and there is a lovely freshness about the air. What a beautiful morning !!

The “news” section on web-site was being updated every hour as people fannied about re whether they are golfing or dining, or whether their partners (how politically correct is that ?) are joining us or not or was George flying to Kuwait or in fact would Nigels old boiler be replaced that day.Would we have no MacGruers or two MacGruers ? (bit like busses ?) Would Jannie be able to get the day off work ? Yes, some of us are still working and have to take holiday for this event you know !

 But, back to Friday.Having raised our expectations that we could get fed before golfing, Bill had said on the web site that Bacon Rolls +coffee would actually now NOT be available but “he was working on an alternative”. I chose to have my usual horse food and fruit at home just in case. (my body as you know is actually a temple!)

 Two Balas pick me up on time (have you ever been picked up by the Balas ? it`s not as painful as it sounds !) The roads have obviously been cleared to allow the golfers to progress smoothly to the course and we arrive in plenty of time to a closed Tam O`Shanter Bar at Bellisle. Who cares ? the sun is out,  the sky is blue, and the birds are twittering….and there`s a wee squirrel bouncing along the path.

 We check out the course…(it`s open and looks great.) get the shoes on etc and notice Bill C (aka Dog Fiddler) and Mark Norman (aka English Git) getting stuff out of the car.

 Well !….they proceed to set up a wee gas picnic stove with frying pan, rolls, bacon, fresh orange juice and coffee !

  This just blows us all away. What a fantastic touch to start off the day. The sizzling bacon smells superbe and it tasted even better.

  Picture the scene: Bill with apron and surgeons gloves on cooking away with Nooners munching on their rolls….hey careful Bill or you`ll damage those latex gloves….it`s ok…they`ve been used before ! (Lilly the pink nearly vomits !)

 As we enjoy our breakfast al fresco, the cards are “dealt” and the cards have all been pre-printed with our names on them with the Competition name Green Jacket. Another nice touch.

 We are forced to leave our impromptu park bistro and head off to the starters office.

Well……..what can I say ?  The starter has all the charm of a grizzly bear with a sore arse but clearly has less brains ! We finally get season tickets and guest passes etc sorted out and the first 4 ball tees off from the White Tees.  Grizzly Adams shows a remarkable turn of speed and charges on to the tee growling “yellow boxes, yellow boxes !!” This guy makes Troon Starters look friendly !

 So, drives are re-hit off yellows and the golf has started. Did you enjoy my little pre-amble ? Good….otherwise I`m wasting my bloody time writing it.

 Golf ? I was in 3 ball with Jannie and Mark. Some good banter, some good golf, some bad golf. We all had 17 pts to the turn so we`re all in contention. The course is in good nick, the rough is horrendous…best not go there !

 I really can`t remember much about the details.. the pace was good.

 Nearest the pin at 10^th ? this screwed up my card as I blobbed for the first time (failed to exit bunker) we didn`t threaten the green .

 Longest Drive 15^th ? I wasn`t actually aware as we drove off but I hit a fine smack down the middle which looked to be rolling on well while my colleagues were faffing about in the rough. I keep telling these youngsters.”.keep it on the short stuff guys” but no, they keep booming them all over the shop as opposed to my steady paps down the centre ! Truth be told Jannie was using 2 iron most of morning to excellent effect and Mark was doing his usual Big Bender Drives and hitting most fairways as well.

Anyway as I wander up fairway we spot the Long drive ticket with Bala Snr name on it. My ball is just about visible in the distance significantly further down than his puny effort….did you use a 7 iron Bala ?

 Obviously I watch what the game behind does….they don`t hit fairway so that looks good !

 My card has recovered from the blob with a few 3 pointers and I`m heading for 36 points if I can keep this up .(so is Jannie) .On the 17^th par three after some deliberation re club selection I go for 8 iron…and thin it really badly, but it JUST clears river and skims on to the back of green..bit of a break there Rossco…could be your day ! Jan trickles in for a two. I have a long slight down hill putt and the bloody ball just kept going…6 ft past hole (actually my long putts were really good all day so this was first real aberration) and I walk off with a four….disappointing but not the end of the world …..yet !

18^th Hole : Both Jan + I go badly right and are blocked by trees. We both decide to be wise and chip out sideways back to fairway which Jannie does perfectly. I chip mine out as well but too well and it flies into serious rough on left…Bollocks ! First lost ball of day and Blob results for Stable ford. 32 points in total for me and 34 pts for Jannie. Mark ???? spectacular collapse on back nine with 7….yes, seven points for a total of 24 for him.

   Jan is top equal points with Ian McKenzie with 34 pts as well and Ian takes it on the count back……well done Ian….hard luck Jan…..but hey….a pint of lager, fish + chips with mushy peas , a lovely day with more to come…..we`re ALL WINNERS in my world !!

Going to skip the afternoon as we didn`t win !…The old farts did. And I`m not going to winge about my 4 ball only having ¾ handicap and the 3 ball having full handicap…cos that would be churlish !

Good turn out for evening event…twenty ish plus ?

Also, a lot of good prizes donated.

Ardneil did us proud re food quality and quantity and a right good atomosphere was created with plenty of mixing slagging etc.

Many complements were(rightly) said on the night to thank Bill for arranging the event and I would like to add my own.

At quite short notice we had golf booked morning and afternoon with enough of a gap between to have a relaxed lunch, a fast /relaxed format in afternoon and again enough time to visit 19^th hole at Chestnuts Hotel. Then enough time for showers etc before evening event . Prize allocation had been prepared and thought about and Head Nooner handed them out with his usual barbs…(he seemed surprised that Rossco won longest Drive ?)

 All in all an extremely successful day which was quite well supported.

However Guys, this annual event has been in danger of collapsing and I feel that we should all be making the effort to participate in both the golf AND evening event. We all enjoy the Nooners golf with all the leagues, matches, banter etc and part of being a Nooner includes Green Jacket Day. Yes, we can`t always get the time off or it clashes with holidays etc (I`ve missed several due to hols) but having breathed new life into the event this year I would ask that we do what we can to support next years event. The date has already been set as 20 th June. All Nooners past + present invited.

  Thanks again Bill

                               Lilly

Ps Did I mention that I won the Longest Drive ????